Confession of an institutionalized disciple

Today I went to Starbucks in an attempt to make friends with anyone there. This time it was a failed attempt. There were groups of young people huddled, chatting, others going over assignments and readings together. But somehow it hindered me from going to them. Obviously there is fear in myself. Fear of being rejected. Fear of ridicule. Fear of the unexpected. But now I think about it. What would happen if I take initiative and reached out? Regardless, I have this discovery. That why most Christians stay on the four walls of the church, and would rather not go out to the wells where people gather. Because somehow we find security with the familiar. I find control over the situation when I'm inside the church. But I realized this very fortress becomes the prison that keeps me from doing what I'm called to do--discipling others. See, I've realized that my vision must be free to fly, boundless. And institutionalized church organizations keep it from soaring. The fish are not in the church (at least the fresh ones). They are out there ready for harvest as Jesus said. Lord, may this be a learning experience for me. I'm definitely not yet giving up. I'm thinking of going to a person I know who could mentor me regarding this.

Stand and Pray

Ephesians 6:10-20

Two words keep on repeating. Stand and Pray.

The premise on these three instances of standing is putting the full armor of God.

Stand against the devil's schemes, his temptations and oppressions (v. 11). It's a lie that one cannot resist him or his temptations. James tells us to resist him and he will flee. One can fight him in Spirit and the full armor of God.

Stand when the day of evil comes (v. 13). The days of evil are inevitable as everyone experiences tragedies and loss in varying levels in different times. Preparation is the ally of the God's soldier. A soldier of God must endure and not run away on days of hardships.

Stand firm (v. 14). Paul is not only speaking of momentary vigilance. At another place in this verse he says to be alert at all times. While we are in the world, the enemy will continue to try and destroy us (for we are God's crown of creation which he will never be). This is our defense against the enemy.

Three things praying is mentioned by Paul. Two mentions the manner we ought to pray. Three, what we ought to pray for.

Pray in the Spirit (v. 18). Pray in humility to the leading of the Holy Spirit, as one aligns with His will for whatever one is praying for. Pray in the unknown tongue the Spirit has bestowed to the one who has been baptized in fire. Perhaps the most powerful offense a Christian has in his spiritual artillery.

Pray at all times (v. 18). There are two "modes" of prayer. We may call it formal and informal prayers (for lack of a better term). Formal prayer are set appointments with the Lord to offer our worship and supplications to Him, absent of distractions within and around our body, mind and soul. Informal prayers are one must be accustomed to for we may not yet know it. By constantly being aware of the Spirit, just as one does his work with a companion, in simple conversations and supplications (Nehemiah's prayers are described as arrow prayers).

Pray with all kinds of prayer and requests (v. 18). The keyword here is "all kinds". It is comforting to realize that our God is a God who is able to answer "all kinds" of needs one can have. He is not only a Master Provider, but a loving Father, that desires to see the joy in His children, even in the simplest joy and surprises of life.

Pray for all the saints (v. 18). As the Christian grows he must understand that he is part of a bigger picture of God's story. Therefore, we must not only pray for our needs, but the needs of others, especially those of the faith.

Pray the fearless declaration of the gospel (v. 19, 20). As a Christian bearing the name of Christ, one must realize that he has become part of an ever-growing and ever-extending kingdom of God in the world. And one must pray for the agressive expansion of the gospel. Paul mentions praying for him as God's minister, but we ought also to pray for ourselves for confidence in living a victorious life, perhaps the only visible image of Christ to your family, friends and spheres of influence; Confidence to stand and speak for what is right against the world's backward flow to corruption.

Melancholy minister's guide to relationship building

Yesterday in our Principles and Methods of Teaching class, after our lecture on the 6 characteristics of an outstanding teacher (according to a survey conducted to the recipients of Metrobank's Outstanding Teacher's award. The six were expertise in subject matter, class management, instruction, diagnositcs, communication, relational), our professor asked which of the six we need to work on more. Surprisingly, more than half of the class (we were around 10) admitted that we have to work on relational expertise. Indeed it's an irony if we observe that as ministers we do a kind of work that has to deal with people at its core, and that most ministers have difficulty in relationship building.

This is my observation as well. I have known great leaders and ministers, who manifest the same thing. I myself am that way so let me speak for myself. After much thought I realized that most teachers and leaders either have a choleric (leader) and melancholy (analyzers, organizers) personality. Most of us are also introverts and thinkers. Cholerics talk for business (as oppose to sanguines who talk for pleasure). Melancholies on the other hand, value deep friendships requiring much time to build, so they have few but deep friendships. With these in mind, we will understand why we experience this "difficulty" in relationship building. We don't really have a difficulty in building relationships, we just don't have enough time (as melancholies) to spend time with each person so to build relationship with them. To say it correctly, we build relationships slowly because we invest time and trust in it. We think momentary interactions with people lack validity to invest time and effort to build relationship, so we think it is no use to do it. But we need to understand, in a ministry career that always deal with people, in both short term and long term, we need to understand that every moment counts and by putting our heart in what we do, we create a positive experience for the other person. This is not a natural trait for us, and should be an intentional habit to develop. By understanding how God created us to be, we can use our strengths for the benefit of the group or organization.

Consider these action steps:

1. Seize short-term interactions as opportunities for positive experiences - Since taking initiative in relationship building is not a natural trait for melancholies, be purposeful and intentional with it. Discipline yourself to do it as a minister. Do not see it as already a failed mission (to build relationship at a short amount of time), but an opportunity to create a positive experience (one principle in "The Starbucks Experience") for the person, and also as an investment for the possibility of future interactions with the person.
   
   
2. Choose deep friendships wisely and continually cultivate and enrich them - Since we value deep friendships, choose the friends where you will invest much time and trust wisely. This does not mean to be exclusive, but see these as long-term investments for you and the other person. It is said we become the people we spend much time with.
   
   
3. Tap on innate compassion to touch other people - According to studies, melancholies are compassionate people. They are the first to cry at an mushy advertisement. Because their awareness of the emotional, they can easily relate and empathize with the suffering and the hurting. We must tap in this strength. We must also understand, that at the other extreme of this is our innate weakness to over-focus on ourselves when we go through problems. So again keeping ourselves off that weakness is an intentional discipline. 

Day in the Life: The Next Three Weeks

• This Friday is my birthday. Though I haven't given it much thought. I have to change that attitude, because every year is a milestone of God's faithfulness to me.
• On Saturday, my family and Netty's parents will meet for lunch in Makati. Our parents will meet for the first time. Praying that it will be good.
• Next Tuesday, I will go to Subic for a Leadership Conference. I am excited already, to learn from experiences of others. To relax and chill. Will be there until Saturday.
• After that, it will be our school's semestral retreat. I need this badly because I need a fresh outpouring from God.
• I recently finished reading "The Starbucks Experience" it's a good read, recommended for us who like people management and strengthening organizations. I'm currently reading "Behavior Management" by Blanchard which is an easy read despite its looks. It was our reading in Church Admin and Finance class in ASCM, and now I'm just starting to read it from cover to cover. I have realized that I have this growing interest in people management and organizations. I feel this and the Leaders Conference will bring me much good.
• Yesterday, I surprised visit Netty in her clinic. I brought food we both like. Potato Chicken salad and Apple Walnut salad in the salad bar in Food Choices G4 (forgot the name); Chicken mushroom soup & chicken sandwich from Soup Kitchen in G5. I missed her greatly, after for some time we've been talking on the cell because their landline is down. Talking in cell for a long time is uncomfortable. We had a "candle light" meal on her clinic. It was very lovely.
• Lately I realized how I look is important to me, no matter how we say we don't. I have this annoying acne for a while perhaps because of stress over work and wedding preparations. And it's really a nuisance.

Great leaders give beyond what is asked of them

I was reminded of this principle twice recently. There is a kind of leader who would not go beyond what is expected of them. First there are those who because of lack of vision and ownership of the organization, they do not see the point of making effort. Every work is a tedious one. Secondly are those who does their job description. Nothing wrong with that. But it is for the same reason that they fail to excel in life--lack of vision, a bigger purpose in life. They do not see themselves as part of a bigger picture wherein their role is vital to the success of the organization. They are those who do not see beyond the fence. I believe there is more. Great leaders give beyond what is asked of them. They give the 110%. They are those who doesn't wait to be asked, but they themselves ask what good can they bring to the organization. They do not negotiate the easiest road. They see what is beyond the fence, and will never stop to reach it no matter how hardships present themselves along the way. Where do we start? (1) Discover your purpose, your life's vision. (2) Commit yourself to causes that will help you live out your vision (or better yet create your own cause) and (3) Be an asset to your organization, own the vision and help it bring it's vision into reality.

I remember an illustration about a certain person who walked past a cathedral that is being built. He asked the construction workers there, "What are you doing?" The first said, "I am laying bricks." The second said, "I am building a wall." And the third said, "I am helping build a beautiful cathedral." See, all of them were doing the same chore, but the last one had a broader understanding of his role in the creation of something good. As leaders not only do we have to see the bigger picture for ourselves, but bring the whole team to see what you see.

Day in the Life: Sinusitis & Dads

Today I woke up with a bad sinusitis so bad it hurts my head. It was early early morning. I woke up to the footsteps of my dad who wakes up before the sun rises. I went out of the room with a very painful head. My dad offered me to put some balm on my head, something he usually does for me, one of those father and son moments I wouldn't grow out of. Then I went back to sleep. In fact, I slept many times today. My body is feeling heavy, perhaps because of the flu, or somehow because of the workout video I've been following. Ate Me-anne gave me that.

Making Significant Impact in Middle-Management

This question popped out in my mind today: "How do you make significant impact in middle management?" You are not the top dog, you're not on the grassroots also. One cannot impliment all one's plans in entirety because you're not the top dog. I've learned it's not always good to assume the top dog position when you are not the top dog. Among other things, sustainability--it would be hard to sustain one's cause in an environment driven in the values of the top dog. In relation to downline and co-workers, it's sometimes difficult to expect excellence according to your personal definition of what is excellent. This is a difficult pill to swallow because I am a choleric-melancholy. Choleric--I want to do it my way; & melancholy--I want it to be perfect. I am not saying these ramblings are fair and right. In fact the challenge for me is always push myself to always see the good in people; to lower my "perfection" standards; and see that I am part of a bigger universe, of a shared community having shared experiences. One who always asserts himself to be the measuring rod for every person's behavior and performance is conceited and self-glorifying.

To make significant impact in middle-management I could think of living out these things:

1. Do your best - At the end of the day, it's a good feeling knowing that you've put in your 100% in what you did.

2. Keep your nose where it's supposed to be - Know your job description. If you're nosing on other people's work in a bad way like thinking how it would be better if it was done your way, it's just a waste of your time. Let people do their job. Learn to appreciate their contribution to the organization. Don't misinterpret. Helping others become better is good, if in a humble and sincere approach.

3. Clean-up your own backyard - Similar to #2. Jesus said, before telling other people to wipe their muta in their eyes, wipe your own muta in your eyes first. It's more credible when advise comes from a person who has a good track record.

4. Trust God's promotion - I believe that if you do what you're supposed to be doing, and you're doing your best, God's promotion is around the corner. And even if it doesn't come swiftly, know that when you do your best you just made God glad and you stayed true to yourself.

5. Be confident, but be humble - Confidence is not over-confident. Humility is not false humility. Be confident in what you do. Be humble because you're still learning and you're definitely not the smartest person in the world.

6. Always put oneself in other people's shoes - To keep oneself from being too conceited. Always consider other people's feelings and circumstances. Ask, what would you do if you are in the person's situation.

7. People are the way they are because all people have histories - Think twice before responding negatively to any people. Perhaps they bit you because something horrible happened to them before they met you and you just happened to be a victim of their hurts and past. Retaliating makes you accountable to your actions and does not contribute in making the world a better place.

8. Support your direct report and augment his strengths (Be an Aaron & Hur to your Moses) - Learn to be submissive and teachable. Don't make your boss life even more difficult by being difficult. Your boss is not your enemy. He is your ally in making positive significant impact in your organization. Learn to become a support to him by lifting him up on your shoulders.

9. Be an asset in your organization, not a liability - Instead of gloating and complaining, explore and commit yourself to become a valuable indespensible asset in the organization. Find your unique niche where you can make significant impact.

10. Chill, live one day at a time - Problems do not cease to exist. So relax. Have fun while you pursue your goals. Stop and smell the roses. Live one day at a time, one step at a time. Everyday has a worry of it's own (Jesus said that).

Thanksgivings

I should be on work mode, but I'm procrastinating. I'm like this when there is a sudden change in work focus. A few weeks back I was doing well with this one kind of work and getting paid well for it. Then the boss changes my position and suddenly it's like I've been delaying myself from starting this new work.

But anyway, while in this mode, let me take advantage by updating my blog. (Another delaying tactic.)

I haven't written much lately. Much of my posts have been personal devotions from my readings. Been rambling about Facebook and our church's website (www.bfgfc.blogspot.com).

Wedding. I can't imagine that it's 5 months now until our wedding day. To tell the truth, I'm still not in the panic mode, perhaps because of other cares. Like saving up for it. Don't get me wrong, I am very much looking forward to be with Netty, share one house among other things. And God has been really faithful to us, bringing in the necessary funds at the right time. It's our trust and patience that is being tested. But ever since this chapter of my life I've told close friends that my prayer was that God will prove himself faithful to us, that our friends and family will see that all of this is God's doing. And even now, He never fails in meeting our needs. I mean how can one put an explanation to this: I work part-time, and not an 8-5 job. More than half of my time is spent in ministry and study. But still we are just ok. Friends and family are also supportive of us, pledging for some of the consummables in the wedding. I believe part of this wondrous move of God is through the prayers of prayerful people we know (one is my mom), and those we don't know that they are praying for us. Today I feel assured that after that Day, we can just sit back and marvel, shed a tear or two, realizing that God has been always there and has brought us through this wilderness moment to the promise land He prepared for us. I find great comfort and encouragement in these verse in Psalms: "They cried out to the Lord in their trouble, and he brought them out of their distress. He stilled the storm to a whisper; the waves of the sea were hushed. They were glad when it grew calm, and he guided them to their desired haven" (107:28-30).

There's so much things to be thankful to God for this few weeks. On September 15-19, I will be going to a leadership training institute in Subic. It was the second time that Ms. Grace Sumbillo has invited me to join this training. This time I felt strongly to join this training. What's unique about this training is that this is not like a crowd-conference, but only a handful of people are invited, and they can personally interact with the resource speaker they invited. Consider these resource speakers: Bishop Ef Tendero, national director of PCEC, Ptr. Joey Bonifacio, senior pastor of Victory Christian Fellowship, and Ptr. BJ Sebastian, a pastor at the same time VP for a handful of big companies in the Philippines, and many more. Awesome. I've always thought and consider it a fact about me: "I am the kind of person who gets it when he really sets himself in accomplishing it." There is just one problem: The registration fee is costs P16K! I mean, I'm saving up for our wedding so where could I possibly get an extra. I prayed that if God wanted me to participate in this, that He would make a way for me to make it possible. The institute was offering scholarship discounts for active church workers, so I applied for it. After a week, I was granted the maximum allowable scholarship (50%). I also submitted a support letter to my church, expecting to receive a humble support because of the church's other needs, and to my surprise, by the next week, I was informed that they will be supporting me. And thus, now less than more than 80% of the registration fee is already covered. I mean, this is more than I expected but here it was. And credit God this.

Well there is one more story to be thankful for, that is our ministry work in Makati. It is really doing well. But it should wait for now, because I gotta prepare for my 2PM midterm exam in school.

Let this be a reminder to myself that I serve a good and all-powerful God.

Out.

PS. If you are praying for me kindly consider these prayer points:

• Continuous provision for our wedding, we are facing will be facing the giant of our expenses this September.
• My work, that more work will come in ... big projects!
• I am praying that the whole leadership insitute expenses will be covered soon: The remainder of the reg fee (P2000) and transportation (P500) and pocket expenses.
• Continuous growth in our Makati Carecell, we have been making progress, regular members are slowly being emerging, and the potential for the development of leaders is positive.
• Teaching fervor and passion. I will be teaching this Sunday on "My Spiritual Family". This is a monthly, 3-hour discipleship training we do in BFGFC where I serve as small groups and discipleship pastor.

The big problem

"So what makes the Filipino special? We are brown, spiritual, timeless, spaceless, linguists, groupists, weavers, adventurers. Seldom do all these profound qualities find personification in a people. Filipinos should allow - and should be allowed to contribute their special traits to the worldwide community of men - but first, we should know and like ourselves." - Ed Lapiz

About today's happenings ...

People-power-esque standout as Aquino's carosa moves in to Manila Cathedral ... can't help but think how long (days or weeks) will this "spirit of unity" will last ... May it not be just hype or a frustrated sense of nostalgia. Like Ted Failon said on TV, let's put this sense of patriotism and involvement to good use, that is when we decide for the future of this country.