The Mind of the Melancholeric Man: Musings on Life and Ministry by Patrick Tan
"I will not offer burnt offerings to the LORD my God which cost me nothing ." - David (2Sa 24:24)
There is something valuable about giving up to God (something) that cost us (something, forgive the redunduncy), moreover cost us everything. In this passage, David realizes his flaw and begins to atone for it by setting up an altar from another person's territory. Though his subject allows him to offer his sacrifice free of charge of venue even provide his own working bull as an offering, David strictly declines: "No, but I will surely buy it from you for a price, for I will not offer burnt offerings to the LORD my God which cost me nothing." In the end it says the Lord was moved by David's prayer and lifted judgment upon him and Israel. Three things when we talk about offering God something that means something: (1) Meet your God in your threshing floor. (2) Never deceive yourself by allowing others pay for your load. (3) Understand that your heart/attitude and actions (in other words, integrity) comes to play.
There is something valuable about giving up to God (something) that cost us (something, forgive the redunduncy), moreover cost us everything. In this passage, David realizes his flaw and begins to atone for it by setting up an altar from another person's territory. Though his subject allows him to offer his sacrifice free of charge of venue even provide his own working bull as an offering, David strictly declines: "No, but I will surely buy it from you for a price, for I will not offer burnt offerings to the LORD my God which cost me nothing." In the end it says the Lord was moved by David's prayer and lifted judgment upon him and Israel. Three things when we talk about offering God something that means something: (1) Meet your God in your threshing floor. (2) Never deceive yourself by allowing others pay for your load. (3) Understand that your heart/attitude and actions (in other words, integrity) comes to play.
You Raise Me Up
Selah
When I am down, and oh my soul, so weary | When troubles come and my heart burdened be | Then, I am still and wait here in the silence | until You come and sit awhile with me.
[+] You raise me up, so I can stand on mountains | You raise me up, to walk on stormy seas | I am strong, when I am on Your shoulders | You raise me up to more than I can be
There is no life, no life without its hunger | each restless heart beats so imperfectly | But when You come and I am filled with wonder | sometimes, I think I glimpse eternity
When I am down, and oh my soul, so weary | When troubles come and my heart burdened be | Then, I am still and wait here in the silence | until You come and sit awhile with me.
[+] You raise me up, so I can stand on mountains | You raise me up, to walk on stormy seas | I am strong, when I am on Your shoulders | You raise me up to more than I can be
There is no life, no life without its hunger | each restless heart beats so imperfectly | But when You come and I am filled with wonder | sometimes, I think I glimpse eternity
Hey I'm back. Got back from Cebu Friday evening. Congress was a blast! Especially hearing and being inspired and encouraged from our special speaker Ptr. Chris Long. Been very busy as I now prepare to go up to Ifugao. Our team will be leaving at 8:30PM to take an 11 hour bus ride to Kiangan, Ifugao. They say this is the site of the Yamashita's treasure.
Today is Mothers Day. I delivered the Mothers Day message about honoring our parents. It went well. I'm amazed how God uses imperfect people. I am nothing without Christ.
Today is Mothers Day. I delivered the Mothers Day message about honoring our parents. It went well. I'm amazed how God uses imperfect people. I am nothing without Christ.
Your Unfailing Love
When the darkness fills my senses
When my blindness keeps me from your touch,
Jesus come
When my burden keeps me doubting
When my memories take the place of you
Jesus come
And I'll follow you there to the place where we meet
And I'll lay down my pride as you search me again
Your unfailing love over me again
When my blindness keeps me from your touch,
Jesus come
When my burden keeps me doubting
When my memories take the place of you
Jesus come
And I'll follow you there to the place where we meet
And I'll lay down my pride as you search me again
Your unfailing love over me again
Saturday evening. I'm here at our staff annual retreat in the room with Kuya Larry. Punta de Fabian in Antipolo is not as cool as Tagaytay, but the place is very nice, the facilities and all. I bet the price is also "nice." But I'm very thankful that I was able to join this retreat even though I'm just part-time staff. But still they treat me as family (I'm the bunso of the team, since I'm the youngest). On our trip we are joined by the National Book of Hope Team of Taiwan.
This morning we went to Pagsanjan Falls. It's a great place, though I still like Tapiyya Falls of Ifugao better. But I enjoyed the journey to Pagsanjan Falls as canoes take you upstream through wide rivers and narrow rushing rapids. It was all nature, no sign of human creation or desecration, except for small sari-saris here and there. Water is very, very cold and one could see small fishes beneath the surface of the water. The river is walled by two great walls of lush green vegetation with occasional trickling of small falls above. They say above the cliff is Caliraya. When we reached the falls, we took pictures and swam in the rapids. On the way back I tried on rowing the canoe reminiscent of my dragonboat days. Went home tired and slept the whole afternoon 'til evening.Tonight during our sessions the "newbies" were asked to share a bit of their journey to Book of Hope & APCC (Asia Pacific Campus Challenge is the department I belong). For me it was really unannounced because my name wasn't really on the list on paper. But anyway, so I shared. I didn't realize that I am already here for 6 months. Since November 2005 when I resigned from work until now. God is really faithful, I mean as you journey in time, you can really see how God has made His promises and still doing it, revealing Himself and His work for me and to me progressively. After I spoke I didn't really feel that I got my message completely across, so I figured I will outline it below.
Through this retreat I sensed that I fit in this place (for now. I don't know what God has for me in the future). I am beginning to appreciate the people, and so I am beginning to open up. I met a very interesting girl from Taiwan, she doesn't speak English fluently but her passion for Jesus is amazing. We agreed to continue communicating when she gets back to Taiwan so she could practice her English. In the future, I am looking at the possibility of working full-time. But for now, I need to finish my studies, if the Lord wills.
Time to sleep. We have service tomorrow.
My Journey to Book of Hope
2003.12
- AG Philippines General Assembly in Caliraya, Laguna. I was introduced to Kuya Sur and he invited me to join Asian Institute for Youth Studies in April 2004
- In 2003 I was also professionally working on Hopenet.net website for APCC.
2004.03
- Graduated in UST with a Bachelor of Science in Architecture. Dilemma to work between secular and ministry began. Began to pray.
2004.04
- First contact with Ate Beth for student arrangements for AIYS through phone, text & e-mails.
- Went up to APTS for AIYS 2004. Got to know Kuya Sur better, challenging me in the ministry.
- Met Kuya Ty & Ate Cina Silva, the directors of BOH-APCC.
- Prayer answered through word of the Lord from one of classmates.
2004.06
- Inquired and began to enroll in ASCM but denied because of late application.
2004.10
- First semester in ASCM.
2005.04
- Mission trip to Badjaos in Bataraza, Palawan with Pastor Joedy and Good News Christian Fellowship of Dagupan City. Made a lasting impression to the leadership of BFGFC youth.
2005.05
- Began preparation for Book of Hope distribution in Filipino-Chinese schools of Manila with Ate Angie Tud.
- National Youth Congress in Iloilo City.
2005.06
- Second semester in ASCM.
- 5 out of more than 15 schools were approved in Book of Hope distribution.
2005.07
- Volunteered in Book of Hope distribution for Gospel Church of Manila in Jose Abad Santos High School. My first Book of Hope presentation in classroom.
- Book of Hope distribution in Metropolitan Nursing College, Hope Christian High School, Sun Yat Sen High School, Manila Patriotic Academy, and Jin Nan Institute with Affect Destiny Team from Las Vegas.
- Book of Hope distribution in Tondo High School.
- Hopefest and weekly student fellowship held at church but short-lived.
2005.10
- Invited to speak for Chi Alpha Campus Ministries of Compostella Valley in Davao City.
- Finally after much hesitation, I finally quit my job in Vignettes for Training as one of the last pioneer designers (2002) in the company.
- Third semester in ASCM (the loss of job, emotional stress and school work brought together an all-time low in me).
2005.11
- Called Kuya Jerry Balbuena to inquire for job openings in Book of Hope. But Ty and Cina are not in Manila.
- Two weeks after, as I am about to ask Kuya Jerry to cancel interview for other job options, the Silvas arrive and scheduled me for interview.
- November 21, Monday officially started work in APCC.
2006.05
- 6th month in APCC.
- Currenly working on Hope Education Foundation text books for Swaziland on literacy and AIDS awareness program.
Things I rave about this May: Almost every week I'm going away. Today after lunch I'm off to Antipolo and Pagsanjan for our staff retreat in Book of Hope. Next two weeks I'm off to Cebu for the National Youth Congress of AG. Week after that I'm going to Ifugao to do missions with Kuya Alvin and Ate Angie. These are the good days. I thought this year would be boring but it's all good. What's cool about this is that it's not totally a vacation as in lie down, eat drink and be merry, but I'm still doing part of ministry to my Lord. How cool is that. Too bad I'm missing this Saturday's Carecell party, we've just had new staff and I believe something good is up in their sleeves. God is good.
I also anticipating the Da Vinci Code, too bad I'm gonna see it after I got back from Ifugao.
I also anticipating the Da Vinci Code, too bad I'm gonna see it after I got back from Ifugao.
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