It's been two weeks ago since I joined Asia Pacific Media Ministries to work as web and graphic designer. The work is ok. So why did I employ myself in a full time job, many ask. First of all I need a stable income now I'm married. Freelance work is good but sporadic. I still do freelance jobs though for additional income. Second I need the discipline. Working at home is not as beneficial as one would think, specially working in your bedroom. I need the discipline and the motivation that a working environment gives. And both of these I got with the work I have now. Actually, I am working for three companies: Asia Pacific Media Ministries, ICI Philippines, and Assemblies of God Missionary Fellowship, each sharing an amount of a days work during the week. I thought to myself why haven't I thought of this (working in APMedia), which like right now in this season fits like a glove. I enjoy both the creative and ministry element of it. Most of my co-workers have a part-melancholy temperament in them so I get them and they get me. It's really doing good for now.
P.T.
Of course with the Makati church planting project around the corner sometimes I get concerned how all of this will work out. I mean working a full-time job and doing the job of a pioneering pastor. Last Wednesday, we had a very fun-filled evening at our joint fellowship in Makati which were composed of Kamagong and Ayala Carecells. We were 35 in all. What's interesting is that earlier our projected attendance was 35 people, and 35 people appeared. I thought I wished we'd projected a higher number. But kidding aside, I am amazed at how God works in this ministry.
During our core group meeting, I shared with them that as a leader there are times that I do things with confidence in my own strength--the things I usually and already used to do. This is not that time. To quote the apostle Paul (?), I come trembling and much fear (1 Co 2:3). The worst nightmare of a choleric person is to wake up one morning when he doesn't have it altogether. I have realized more than once that I don't have it altogether (causing an amount of stress and anxiety within me), but it works anyway. Then a revelation, it's not because of me that's this is possible, it's all about God.
I remember a verse in Acts when Peter and John were arrested for preaching the gospel. And during the interrogation, a respected teacher of the Jewish Law named Gamaliel stood and addressed his colleagues:
"Men of Israel, consider carefully what you intend to do to these men. Some time ago Theudas appeared, claiming to be somebody, and about four hundred men rallied to him. He was killed, all his followers were dispersed, and it all came to nothing. After him, Judas the Galilean appeared in the days of the census and led a band of people in revolt. He too was killed, and all his followers were scattered. Therefore, in the present case I advise you: Leave these men alone! Let them go! For if their purpose or activity is of human origin, it will fail. But if it is from God, you will not be able to stop these men; you will only find yourselves fighting against God." - Acts 6:36-39If I do this ministry in my own strength, IT WILL FAIL--or explode, implode, burnout or burst into pieces etc. But if it is from God, IT WILL NOT BE STOPPED. It is a reassuring verse for me because there are times that I resolve to false self-sufficiency when Christ requires the denial of self. It is reassuring because I don't have to try TOO hard, because I am in partnership, if not, in the service of the King--and His purpose always prevails. If it is the Lord's work, He will prosper it. God is good.
P.T.
Recently I think of blogging in the point of view of me as a father. I would blog about the lessons I learned in life so that my children will be able to read it, so that even in their non-existence, in their birth and infancy until they grow-up they would know who their father is really like, how their father loves them so much.
P.T.
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