[Reuters]
The Mind of the Melancholeric Man: Musings on Life and Ministry by Patrick Tan
Narnia Quotes
"You know, Aslan, I'm a little disappointed in you. Did you really think that by giving your life you would save the Human boy? Ha. You are giving up your life, and saving no one. So much for love. ... Tonight, the Deep Magic will be appeased! But tomorrow...we will take Narnia...forever! In that knowledge... Despair... and DIE!!"
"If the Witch knew the true meaning of sacrifice, she might have interpreted the Deep Magic a little differently. For she would know that if a willing victim who had committed no treachery died in a traitor's stead, the Stone Table would crack and even death itself would turn backwards."
"Impossible!"
- White Witch
"If the Witch knew the true meaning of sacrifice, she might have interpreted the Deep Magic a little differently. For she would know that if a willing victim who had committed no treachery died in a traitor's stead, the Stone Table would crack and even death itself would turn backwards."
- Aslan
"Impossible!"
- White Witch
Jesus went straight to the Temple and threw out everyone who had set up shop, buying and selling. He kicked over the tables of loan sharks and the stalls of dove merchants. He quoted this text: "My house was designated a house of prayer; You have made it a hangout for thieves." (Matthew 21:12-13, The Message)
Lord, forgive me when I use your Temple as a den for darkness and evil thoughts when my body should be used only for Your glory, a House that worships and submits to Your will.
Lord, forgive me when I use your Temple as a den for darkness and evil thoughts when my body should be used only for Your glory, a House that worships and submits to Your will.
I thank God that finally I am able to get some good sleep after a week of sleepless nights. Truly rest is a treasured reward. Past few days I've been reading the Chronicles of Narnia: The Lion, the Witch and the Wardrobe. It's great that the movie was true to the book. This was the second time I read a novel after seeing the movie, the first one was Lord of the Rings, began to read it after Two Towers movie. I just feel that Narnia movie could have been better, because I feel that the characters weren't that developed and built up (unlike LOTR) and the set and costumes were to bright and kiddie, I guess they focused on children as demographic. But it's all good, still it made me tear up because of its biblical similarity (although C.S. Lewis insist that this isn't an allegory of Christ, but a creative/imaginary incarnation of Christ, if He would live in Narnia).
Turkish Delight
by the David Crowder Band
Stumbled through the doorway | Into the strangest thing | An unexpected magic land | With snow beneathe my feet | Came across a lady who | Dressed herself in white | She took her coat to cover me | Then a query cold as ice | What do you want?
Turkish Delight, it's my favorite thing | Turkish Delight, what I wouldn't do | Turkish Delight, it's my favorite thing, it gets me every time | Turkish Delight, all I want to do | What I wouldn't do for her?
Wouldn't think I'd fall for it | Wouldn't think I'd lie | But I think I'd do anything | For that tiny bit of pie | I would sell you out | I'd give you all away | A life of treats might do me in | But I gotta get another taste
Finally was able to watch The Chronicles of Narnia: The Lion, the Witch and the Wardrobe in G4 yesterday. Movie is very moving as it allegorizes biblical references especially Christ. After movie, went to buy the book and CD inspired by Narnia. Talk about obsessive compulsive.
Music Inspired by the Chronicles of Narnia
- Waiting For The World To Fall - Jars Of Clay
- Remembering You - Steven Curtis Chapman
- Open Up Your Eyes - Jeremy Camp
- Hero - Bethany Dillon
- Stronger - Delirous?
- Lion - Rebecca St. James
- New World - Tobymac
- I Will Believe - Nichole Nordeman
- Turkish Delight - David Crowder Band
- More Than It Seems - Kutless
- You're The One - Chris Tomlin
Guys, today is the most productive day. My arms are aching from muscle pain because I played badminton tonight. And I just got home. But before I retire, I would like to take this opportunity to give God the glory. I will right the events that transpired today in outline form for now:
7AM - Woke up around 7AM, met client in MRT Buendia about project.
9AM - Went to school, library to cram on my Personal Life Management paper.
11AM - Attended chapel service, led Scripture reading and opening prayer. Worship service was awesome. Ma'am Marcia passed her thesis for doctorate that she gave us a blow-out.
12NN - Continued cramming on my 15-page paper in the prayer room. Realized it was already 30 minutes before class, and barely half of the paper completed. I stopped doing it and tried to look for my professor to ask for a grace period.
2PM - Class, I was nervous because I have nothing to pass. Apparently there were 3 of us who would not be able to pass. Talked to my professor, he wants it on his desk until next Thursday. Score will be deducted for late paper.
5PM - Went to Glorietta 4 with Mutya, Jo and Erene to watch "Don't Give Up on Us" by Piolo and Juday after a dare to watch a Tagalog flick last night in YM conference.
8PM - Left Makati to go to Timog Avenue, my childhood buddy and I will be playing badminton with his sister and his British friend. I sucked at the game. Everyone paired up to me lost. But it was ok, it was so kind of his friend that he taught me some moves.
12MN - Dinner in Baang Cafe in Tomas Morato. I praise God that I was able to share my testimony to them. And they are quite receptive to it. His sister is already a Christian. So on Monday and Thursday we will play badminton again. They also wanted to gather a Bible Study group (when I offered them). Perhaps in two weeks we will start discussing PDL.
3AM - after much catching up and chit chats. I went home.
Praise God, praise God!!!
7AM - Woke up around 7AM, met client in MRT Buendia about project.
9AM - Went to school, library to cram on my Personal Life Management paper.
11AM - Attended chapel service, led Scripture reading and opening prayer. Worship service was awesome. Ma'am Marcia passed her thesis for doctorate that she gave us a blow-out.
12NN - Continued cramming on my 15-page paper in the prayer room. Realized it was already 30 minutes before class, and barely half of the paper completed. I stopped doing it and tried to look for my professor to ask for a grace period.
2PM - Class, I was nervous because I have nothing to pass. Apparently there were 3 of us who would not be able to pass. Talked to my professor, he wants it on his desk until next Thursday. Score will be deducted for late paper.
5PM - Went to Glorietta 4 with Mutya, Jo and Erene to watch "Don't Give Up on Us" by Piolo and Juday after a dare to watch a Tagalog flick last night in YM conference.
8PM - Left Makati to go to Timog Avenue, my childhood buddy and I will be playing badminton with his sister and his British friend. I sucked at the game. Everyone paired up to me lost. But it was ok, it was so kind of his friend that he taught me some moves.
12MN - Dinner in Baang Cafe in Tomas Morato. I praise God that I was able to share my testimony to them. And they are quite receptive to it. His sister is already a Christian. So on Monday and Thursday we will play badminton again. They also wanted to gather a Bible Study group (when I offered them). Perhaps in two weeks we will start discussing PDL.
3AM - after much catching up and chit chats. I went home.
Praise God, praise God!!!
Just came home from school. Did a lot today. Finally one project off my back as I delivered 150 CDs that my brother burned for the past 3 days for a client. Had a meeting with Liberal Party regarding their anniversary presentation. By the way, I had only two hours of sleep today, thanks to this anniversary presentation. Client's project manager had not been an epitome of my perceived leadership since he was such a delegatory (in other words, dumping) leader without clear strategic plan of attack on the project. It's difficult for a choleric to sometimes stand useless in a pressing problem that could have had better solutions.
At noon, I went to school to prepare for Leadership in Missions exam. Arrived 2 hours earlier which I spent its first hour to catch up on sleep and the other to review for my classes. Our missions class is having a missions awareness week in the school as a class project, little excited about it because I could contribute in the aspect of design and music. On the last hour we watched a biographical video of William Carey. OT class at 5PM, watched a video on Jeremiah the prophet. It was a good movie. Film maker took the liberty to use poetic license by adding Jeremiah's love interest, Judith, in the plot.
Third week on this presentation project. Need to get this done. I need to rest.
At noon, I went to school to prepare for Leadership in Missions exam. Arrived 2 hours earlier which I spent its first hour to catch up on sleep and the other to review for my classes. Our missions class is having a missions awareness week in the school as a class project, little excited about it because I could contribute in the aspect of design and music. On the last hour we watched a biographical video of William Carey. OT class at 5PM, watched a video on Jeremiah the prophet. It was a good movie. Film maker took the liberty to use poetic license by adding Jeremiah's love interest, Judith, in the plot.
Third week on this presentation project. Need to get this done. I need to rest.
Today is a great day... so far :)
Lately I've not been getting enough sleep because of a project I'm doing. I really want to get it over and done so I could take time out. Carecell last Saturday was awesome especially the worship. For some time I've been really seeking the presence of God, and at that time He made His presence known. It was when I offer myself to other people, through listening and prayer, that I began to feel God working in me again. Worship was truly awesome. McDonalds after Carecell, then as we prepare to go home, I learned that the car keys were left in the ignition - again. I had to wait for my dad to scooter his keys to me again. My dad is so patient with me. Went home and continued working on projects. Slept late. I am beginning to realize that sleeping late and waking without complete sleeping hours really affects my communion with Him.
Sunday, I led worship and He was there again. If only the congregation would learn to stay passionate for God, we wouldn't be the same again. In the afternoon, my family visited my dad's aunt despite my brother's hesitation because we were dead tired.
Lately I've not been getting enough sleep because of a project I'm doing. I really want to get it over and done so I could take time out. Carecell last Saturday was awesome especially the worship. For some time I've been really seeking the presence of God, and at that time He made His presence known. It was when I offer myself to other people, through listening and prayer, that I began to feel God working in me again. Worship was truly awesome. McDonalds after Carecell, then as we prepare to go home, I learned that the car keys were left in the ignition - again. I had to wait for my dad to scooter his keys to me again. My dad is so patient with me. Went home and continued working on projects. Slept late. I am beginning to realize that sleeping late and waking without complete sleeping hours really affects my communion with Him.
Sunday, I led worship and He was there again. If only the congregation would learn to stay passionate for God, we wouldn't be the same again. In the afternoon, my family visited my dad's aunt despite my brother's hesitation because we were dead tired.
Do Not Worry
If you decide for God, living a life of God-worship, it follows that you don't fuss about what's on the table at mealtimes or whether the clothes in your closet are in fashion. There is far more to your life than the food you put in your stomach, more to your outer appearance than the clothes you hang on your body. Look at the birds, free and unfettered, not tied down to a job description, careless in the care of God. And you count far more to him than birds.
Has anyone by fussing in front of the mirror ever gotten taller by so much as an inch? All this time and money wasted on fashion--do you think it makes that much difference? Instead of looking at the fashions, walk out into the fields and look at the wildflowers. They never primp or shop, but have you ever seen color and design quite like it? The ten best--dressed men and women in the country look shabby alongside them.
If God gives such attention to the appearance of wildflowers--most of which are never even seen--
don't you think he'll attend to you,
Give your entire attention to what God is doing right now, and don't get worked up about what may or may not happen tomorrow. God will help you deal with whatever hard things come up when the time comes.
Has anyone by fussing in front of the mirror ever gotten taller by so much as an inch? All this time and money wasted on fashion--do you think it makes that much difference? Instead of looking at the fashions, walk out into the fields and look at the wildflowers. They never primp or shop, but have you ever seen color and design quite like it? The ten best--dressed men and women in the country look shabby alongside them.
If God gives such attention to the appearance of wildflowers--most of which are never even seen--
don't you think he'll attend to you,
take pride in you,
do his best for you?
What I'm trying to do here is to get you to relax, to not be so preoccupied with getting, so you can respond to God's giving. People who don't know God and the way he works fuss over these things, but you know both God and how he works. Steep your life in God-reality, God-initiative, God-provisions. Don't worry about missing out. You'll find all your everyday human concerns will be met.Give your entire attention to what God is doing right now, and don't get worked up about what may or may not happen tomorrow. God will help you deal with whatever hard things come up when the time comes.
- Jesus Christ
Luke 6:25-34
THE MESSAGE
Luke 6:25-34
THE MESSAGE
As of this moment, I just got up from a 20-minute nap. I have this project going on and I have to present tomorrow morning. Just wrapping up some huge stuff. The slowness of my computer doesn't help. I'm typing from the other computer...
Anyway, I've been out of the blog lately. Been very, very, VERY busy. I could rant but what can ranting do? I just came into conclusion that this is not what He wants me to be in. I need time to sit out and assess my activities and plans. Lots of things are going on my head. I thought of taking the board exam, putting up a business... actually there's a reason behind that but I'm too tired to explain. But one thing's sure, I want to be in full communion with God again. These past few days have been really hectic that I miss my appointments with Him. I'm thankful that I was able to spend time with Him when I drove to work last Monday, I turned the radio off and just began to talk to Him and I really felt His presence. I want that now. I must admit that there is a feeling in my being that I am missing.
Anyway, I've been out of the blog lately. Been very, very, VERY busy. I could rant but what can ranting do? I just came into conclusion that this is not what He wants me to be in. I need time to sit out and assess my activities and plans. Lots of things are going on my head. I thought of taking the board exam, putting up a business... actually there's a reason behind that but I'm too tired to explain. But one thing's sure, I want to be in full communion with God again. These past few days have been really hectic that I miss my appointments with Him. I'm thankful that I was able to spend time with Him when I drove to work last Monday, I turned the radio off and just began to talk to Him and I really felt His presence. I want that now. I must admit that there is a feeling in my being that I am missing.
Sermon on the Riverside
Today is first work day of the year. Struggled to wake up at 8AM, came to office past 9AM in assumption that I was already late. I was the third person who came in, been waiting outside the office for 30 minutes because the doorbell was broken and the phones were in voice mail. Worked on typesetting an English Book of Hope to Tagalog, still missing some resources. Fasting at lunchtime, we shared testimonies of how God has been faithful to everyone in the team. It was an encourager and an eye-opener, how despite the challenges and trials each one of us went through, the fact that God is the same faithful and loving God yesterday, today and forever does not change. 30 minutes to 4, Kuya Rodel rallies the team to go to Marikina Riverside Park for early dinner. It's only 30 minutes drive from the office. It was my first time to go there. The park is clean in a sense that it's all nature. No wonder it's hailed as the cleanest city in the Philippines. The river was literally full of janitor fish, the only existing fish in Marikina River because they wiped out other fish population after some pet owner threw his janitor fish in the river some decade ago.Dinner. Kuya Rodel took us to a riverside grill. The food was OK and abundant for a cheap price. We were 13 in all. Each of us paid P90 full and satisfied. We feasted on sisig, maya-maya sa miso, grilled pusit, pork barbeque, grilled tilapia, green mangoes with onions and bagoong, and Sprite... Then at the end of dinner as we prepare to leave, a homeless boy suddenly approached our table to ask for scraps. In an unexpected response some of the team, Kuya Rodel and Kuya James offered the boy to give him full dinner. There were still left-overs from our dinner, so they ordered rice for Arsenio, the boy's name shortly after chatting with him. He ate beside me, where Kuya James was. Obviously he was very hungry and managed to down 3 cups of rice. He was homeless, sleeps and wanders in the park, dirty, only finished third grade in elementary, hardly knows how to read - sitting beside me. I was stunned. Stunned meaning I didn't know how to react in a neutral sense. I didn't know how to speak to him naturally, human to human, without feeling an inch of disregard and even hypocrisy. Earlier they were teasing me that I'm not used to eating food such as these, meaning I'm some picky rich guy or something which is totally not true. It was a guilt feeling even if I hardly moved in my chair, thinking how I would fail to even see and initiate contact with this kid in a deeply involved way. Clearly it was a dealing of the heart. I was humbled by their goodness and they couldn't care less what other people would say. They even made an effort to share Jesus to him, that Jesus loves him, and even sincerely offered to take him home for a bath. It was a slap in my face. What a lesson God has taught me today.
After that, we walked around, Kuya Rodel dropped me and Kuya James at MRT Station and rode home.
Spend the whole day at home. I have this little project I am dying to get my hands off it. It's due on the 15th, so my agony will soon end. This morning dad came home from somewhere babbling about how successful his nephews are doing business today. I don't know but suddenly I felt, through personally validated assumptions, that he was trying to poke me subtly how our lives should be better if I had just step up to my part in raising the family. Then this overly sensitive kid came out of me asking if I'm making my parents proud of what I am today. Somehow I feel guilty that I am not the architect they expected me to be. I tried to put up a straight face but my dismay was obvious. A series of "what ifs" flied over my head. What if I pursued professional work two years ago? What if I just stopped everything I'm doing right now and focus on taking care of my family? What if...?! Here I go again. I talked to God for strength.
Today I woke up early. Did my devotion first. First work day. Monday, January 2. I have to work on pending projects from last month. I don't want to do it but I have to, which even makes my life even more complicated. I pray that I can finish this time for its due date. But after this, I'm not taking anymore calls. I want to simplify my life. Because today I am a freelance designer, a graphic designer, a church worker, a student. All part-time, none of which I have total focus on. I believe this is not the set-up God wants me to be in. And I have to find His niche for me. I want to do what he wants.
In the man lives the heart
The wellspring of the thoughts of the heart
I wouldn't know how else to call it
Feelings but in a valid sense
for feelings are devious things
Concepts that blur the mind
I am baffled by its schemes
For it pounces at a time unfortune
On a time of false certainty it makes its kill
As past once thought dead rises from the grave
Now alive and burning
as tempered as a bull raging wild
A pinch of confusion sent to taunt the mind of the man
He asks "What is this?"
A desire to take what is taken from him
Perhaps the veil that once blinded his eyes
has been removed to see what I did not see before
All it took was another heart to whisper subtly
[Work in progress]
The wellspring of the thoughts of the heart
I wouldn't know how else to call it
Feelings but in a valid sense
for feelings are devious things
Concepts that blur the mind
I am baffled by its schemes
For it pounces at a time unfortune
On a time of false certainty it makes its kill
As past once thought dead rises from the grave
Now alive and burning
as tempered as a bull raging wild
A pinch of confusion sent to taunt the mind of the man
He asks "What is this?"
A desire to take what is taken from him
Perhaps the veil that once blinded his eyes
has been removed to see what I did not see before
All it took was another heart to whisper subtly
[Work in progress]
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